Pouring my heart into this.

Ohello! First for you maybe to read my words here but certainly not my first time trying to write something consequently in a blog form. There are possibly a few things you might want to know. Why would I start a blog, another blog about beauty and how to shop for the perfect concealer cause that is mostly what we see girls write about? Been there, tried that, was doing fine. However, what I haven`t been writing about is my passion. And my passion is others` passion. And how they chase their passion. Or how not. Guessing already? Here it goes.

I love talking, writing, speaking, thinking about sex and sexuality. I am not nymphomaniac, I am not a prositute, I am not a pervert who will abuse you. I was always interested, closeted and frustrated for a good half of my life before a few years ago I decided to fully embrace my undying interest in anything connected to humping, wanking, or sitting on your hands if that is what you prefer to do.

As well, I am a barista at Starbucks, loving and doing my job with devotion. I am studying Social- and Cultural Anthropology at the University of Vienna, but currently doing minimal work this semester to figure some things out about how to accommodate my brain to my life better. If you are thinking why is that necessary, shall I tell you that recently I have been diagnosed with ADHD, Bipolar Disorder, anxiety, depression all before I turned 25. Still living in a constant fury and confusion, why now, why nobody noticed or did anything as I was a child, the time of this post I am happily in therapy, working through my selfworth issues, selfharm, grief and anger because of the abuse I endured/allowed before I brought together the courage to ask for help. Been a long way since and I will definitely talk about it a lot on this blog, just to prove that I can be just as useful member of society like the big thinkers and researchers before me who did such great breakthroughs which later changed our lives for the better or helped understand ourselves more. I am not saying it is going so bad for me, but I have been/am in my own personal hell at times, but I can always give myself credit for trying to get better and become a better person.

Sounds like the kind of steaming hot mess right? Well, I prefer to think of it as a sexy smoky hot mess which I like to dip my fingers into and build a future. And that future would be finding my ikigai, or making my imagined ikigai to be my real ikigai.

And what my ikigai would be? Sex Education. Oh yes, to teach people say Oh yes a hella lot more often.

...then I was thinking why not start it with a blog?

xoxo,
Alumnia